Cats v Dogs
I don’t know the origin of this but thanks to Dorothy Lepowska-Hudson for sharing!
EXCERPTS FROM A DOG’S DAILY DIARY:
8 AM–Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9:30 AM–Oh, boy! A car ride! My favorite!
9:40 AM–Oh, boy! A walk! My favorite!
10:30 AM–Oh, boy! Getting rubbed and petted! My favorite!
11:30 AM–Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
12 Noon–Oh, boy! The kids! My favorite!
1 PM–Oh, boy! The yard! My favorite!
4 PM–Oh, boy! To the park! My favorite!
5:30 PM–Oh, boy! Pretty mums! My favorite!
6 PM–Oh, boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6:30 PM–Oh, boy! Watching TV with my master! My favorite!
8:30 PM–Oh, boy! Sleeping in my master’s bed! My favorite!
EXCERPTS FROM A CAT’S DAILY DIARY:
Day 183 of my captivity:
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry, hard cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild scolding I get from ruining the occasional
piece of furniture.
Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs! In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair; must try this on their bed.
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was.
Also reminded me of this: Dog’s Rules of Ownership (piccy links broken there unfortunately!)